You have the best days of your life right now. You’re doing well even without anybody’s presence. You made things you’ve just been dreaming about doing before. You’re going to be great on your own. So will you please stop feeling that way?
Stop feeling guilty because you haven’t done anything wrong. You deserve better more than anything else. It’s been five years, yet you still haven’t realized that one. You’re a woman now with full of ambitions and aspirations. No one should stop you, unless you let them. Try to compare yourself now with who you are few years back. You have no ambitions back then. You’re not thinking about living this place, pursuing studies and getting better jobs. Let’s say, you’re way too idealist, until the day you’re able to see the real world before you. Slowly, all these things make sense to you. All these they call “cruel competition, survival, real world” already made sense. So better make a move right now. Not tomorrow or the next few days. I’ve been hearing you making plans on going abroad to study and work. Move back to Philippines, take licensure exam and the rest will follow. Go ahead! Chase your dreams. Take risks, make sacrifice because it’s better to do it now than to have that guilt for the rest of your life. That’s how a real woman should plan and make things work out. Just another months and their responsibility towards you will be done. You will be on your own. Right now you have lots of priorities, as you always do. You’re 10 times busier than before. You deserve to rest and not think about anything else.
You’ve been working all year long, with compensation which isn’t worth enough considering the number of breakdowns you have had. To name a few, you have experienced emotional breakdown, physical, mental and psychological. You’re able to ignore it, suppress and process it with your own. In between with these difficulties, you have spared time listening others because you think these situations allow you to practice your profession. You have known their stories, complaints, plead – all about them that you almost lost yourself in the process. And your greatest escape is to cry, sob in any places at different times. Time and place don’t matter as long as you feel like doing it. You’ve tested yourself so many times. Yet, you continue to emerge despite all of these.
You have better dreams ahead of you. If you’re blessed enough, the whole world will be waiting for you. So stop feeling that way. That’ll not help.
If I’m not going to ask help, will it make independent?
If I ain’t gonna cry, will it make me stronger?
God help me!